Dear Student Body: My Week Summarized

The media has an incredible impact on today's young people... From fashion to philosophy, the media dictates the tone of voice in which all parties are to be heard.

For the Christian, this voice is one of the nagging and discontented hag (or wife. Apparently, the two are interchangeable).
Rarely are Christians heard in their tone of voice. Please note that I'm referring to true Christians, mind you, not those who label themselves as Christians, but whose lifestyle parallels that of the unsaved (I understand that there are Christians who are saved by grace, and walking their life out with the Lord - we are all at different stages in our walk, and your walk is between you and God, but what's on the inside will make itself known to those around you by what shows through on the outside)

The Christian:
We are human!
We mess up, make mistakes, hurt people just like every other human.
We are by no means perfect.
We never will be perfect - not until we have died and are reborn completely in Christ through His blood!
But, we can turn the other cheek and show kindness and compassion when others are mean and rude.
We do love out neighbors - just like you.

As a Christian:
*Please don't judge me because I choose not to throw myself into the midst of total strangers. I am more shy, and bit more private in personality than a lot of people, and I will be friendly, compassionate, caring, loving and very curious about you - I just might not show it with puppy enthusiasm upon meeting you.
* Please don't despise me because I'm not complaining to you about another student. Just because I don't complain to you doesn't mean I'm complaining about you. I do, however, believe that there is already enough negativity in the atmosphere, and the way to fight something is to come against it with it's opposite - positively encouraging and complimenting others.
* Please don't dislike me for the reason that my laugh is soft, my voice is quiet, and I don't talk as much. My personality is just a wee bit more quiet when I'm in a crowd of people. A kind word (and sometimes a quiet word, soft smile, or gentle whisper) turns away wrath.
*Please don't break my work tools because you dislike that I will always look you in the eye, smile and tell you "good morning," or "good afternoon," in acknowledged greeting when I first see you during the day. It's only that I believe it's important to build and maintain relationships.
*Please, please, don't gossip about me because I have complimented our instructor for her incredible fashion sense! I have complimented many a fellow student, and one compliment to an instructor, to three compliments to students is hardly being a suck-up :)
*Please don't detest my existence because I was home schooled. I actually did have home work, had a time I was to be up every morning, did school (curriculum), passed all state testing with flying colors, and had a principle - my father. (And no, I was not allowed to wear pajamas all day, had morning and weekend jobs, did do lab work in Science, had art teachers, even had an economics teacher, can carry a conversation with just about any person I meet and talk with them, non-stop for a good two hours, and the entire conversation be relatively interesting! Now, if this isn't socialized, I don't know what is :)

I don't mind if you want to disown me, and pretend like I'm non-existence - but if you do, please go all the day. Don't just disown me partially and starve me of any positive interaction. But if you must do this, restrain yourself from all negative interaction as well, and I'll content myself.
But, I have one word of warning, my fellow students: if you do pretend like I do not exist, or you continue treating me and the other three girls with disdain and ugliness, please know that I will continue to look you in the eye and tell you good morning and how lovely you look; I will still stay true to my quieter self and keep my laughter soft; I will continue to not complain either to, nor about you, to any other students, staff members or instructors (unless you do something to put me, another student, or yourself in harms way); I will still look before I leap, think before I act, contemplate before I speak, and observe the situation before I jump in.
And most importantly, I will always love you, and always do my best (though sometimes will fail) to treat you with dignity and honor (even when you fail to treat yourself thus)... Especially if you hate me.

---~~~~~~~~---

"An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up." Proverbs 12:25 NIV

"To be self controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands/ fathers, so that no one will malign the word of GOD." Titus 2:5

"Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you be? You ought to live holy and godly lives." 2Peter 3:11

"After an earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper." 1Kings 19:12

"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Proverbs 15:1

"Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone." Proverbs 25:15

"Be completely humble and gentle; Be patient, bearing with one another in love." Ephesians 4:2

"Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in GOD's sight." 1Peter 3:4

"Therefore, my dear brother, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourself fully to the work of the LORD, because you know your labor in the LORD is not in vain." 1Corinthians 15:58

"Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; stand strong." 1Corinthians 16:13

"Therefore, put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand." Ephesians 6:13

"Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the Gospel of Christ. Then, whether I come and see you or only hear about you in my absence, I will know that you stand firm in one spirit, contending as one man for the faith of the gospel." Philippians 1:27

Hosea 2:19; Mark 8:2; Deut 6:5; Deut 10:19; Deut 11:22; Is 55:3; 1John 3:18; 1john 4:12; Jude 1:2; Eze22:14; 1Corinth 4:12; 2Titus 2:3; Isa 61:3;

Up to God

It's about time I follow up on that last post. Sorry it's taken me so long to write it out. The past week and a half has been filled with some school activities, house-repairing parties (one of which will be starting Tuesday and ending sometime before the weekend), reading and helping out at home (a hobby of mine ;)


One of the school activities was reading the Life Purpose Booklet. The book was OK. Most of it was stuff I already knew, had already done was in the process of walking out, but reading the examples in the back helped to clarify some of my own longings, and passions (- a calling?)
My Life Purpose Statement looks like the first-draft that it is. If I try writing beyond the first draft, though, I find that I veer off into all sorts of tangents, bunny trails (dare I say deer paths?) and I soon lose sight of what it is I really feel God has designed my heart for.


I started off this fall looking for a way to broaden my platform - somehow make what I was doing more public through participating in the Miss USA beauty pageant. For the most part the feedback I get is incredibly supportive and affirming, "Aha! That's a great idea!" Eyes light up. "Ooh, you'll do good at that," big awarding smiles... Affirmation, affirmation, affirmation. It was a brilliant! A truly wonderful idea. Now, I do know, for at least some people, that these statements were stated because my peers, my friends, my elders, the people I look up to (even when they are younger than I) believe in me, believe in who I am, and believe in what God is doing... but God has been calling me somewhat deeper.

Something about the whole pageant philosophy/ idea never exactly settled right with me. There was something that just wasn't right; I wasn't exactly sure what was wrong, exactly. I had a general idea, but as to specifics? At least, this is the best way I can explain it...

After prayer with my parents (for the second time), and contemplation, meditation and in the Word time, things began to fall into place a little more clearly.

Upon completing the Life Purpose Booklet, God began to straighten out those jumbled thoughts in my head (there really is something extremely helpful about putting thoughts on paper). For the longest time I've know "what I want to do," what I want the "beginning of the end point" to be. But how, exactly, has been somewhat of a mystery to me. I have not ever been exactly sure how to get to where I want to go... but then, as I was finishing up the book, it hit me, I am doing what I need to be doing...
Better yet God is helping me to do what HE wants me to be doing, what He wants me to get done, how HE wants me to walk it out...
It's AMAZING!!
It's not big and fantabulous, like a wonderful, girly, Cinderella-story beauty pageant, but it's what needs to be done.
My deepest hearts desire isn't to have an international, or even national, or even state-wide, women's ministry where I travel around speaking, singing, dancing... whatever the medium! That's simply not my personality. There are other things, deeper things, I want to get done...
This is an amazing life-calling, life-ministry, and I have some girl-friends who I really do believe are called to this ministry and are walking it out as we speak, but that's not my cup-a-tea ;)


February 2010 was the first year in five consecutive years that I hadn't hosted a Valentines Tea for the young ladies that I know.
The tea started out as a way to get together with a bunch of girl-friends and do something ridiculously girly in the middle of the cold, desolate, freezing, icy winter. This progressed into a protocol study ending in a Christmas tea-celebration and then Valentines party. Which, in turn, progressed into a regular get-together, then Valentines party... progressing into a fashion show-slumber-party, then Valentines "Dreams" tea-party- study... which progressed into....
SO many ideas!

My original dream was to have a retreat, over the weekend, for young ladies regarding femininity - being the young women God has called you to be, seeking who He wants you to be, applying what you were to who you are now to expand His kingdom and bring Him glory. The problem was that there are so many things that really do need to be squeezed in, that the idea expanded into a week-long event, growing into a month-long (sporadically) event, extending into a year-long... I mean... once-a-month event, stretching into a four-year-plan... I mean...
You get the picture ;) There is so much that is applicable to this, so much that really does need to be shared and proclaimed to women of my generation and younger!


There is an incredible amount of ideas and things that need to be shared, but it's just not all feasible for any human being... doing what I can do in the time that is possible is what's required. Be faithful to what God has called (continue doing what I have been doing), the rest is up to God!

Christian Manners; Part 1 - Introduction and Celular Phones

Note to Reader: this is all based on a Biblical, or Christian worldview, and is written to those who share such a world view. I do not mean to, nor do I have any intention of conveying that those who have a Biblical Worldview are any better than those who do not. This is simply the mind-set I know, and the people with whom I see the need to better themselves (in some cases more so than those who do not have a Biblical Worldview.)

This week my nose has been buried in a book lent to me, titled "Twentieth Century Etiquette; A Read Manuel for All Occasions."

As I was reading this more than captivating, and comical, book, my thoughts turned to our culture, my generations social skills, and what a stranger would think, were they to walk into our church and take a good look around in the middle of a service.

Teens openly text on their cell phones, during service, as do some adults. Cell phones don't ring, but a strange vibrating, or buzzing, can be heard omitting from some people's pockets. Gum is chewed, generally with care, hats are worn, and when you get a very ill-manned group of young people, seats are turned into foot rests. It's all quite... appalling! At least, compared to the well mannered, or in that culture, "well bred" circle of human beings.

Etiquette and protocol was not only expected, but turned into an art form. Humans were distinguished by their social circles, who were defined by "good breeding" or "codes of observances."

As is written in Twentieth Century Etiquette:

"Rules of etiquette have their allotted place among the forces of life, and must be acknowledged as moral agents in refining and making more agreeable our daily intercourse with each other. They are agents for good. They teach us to be more lenient with the various elements which compose society, as life is a sort of partnership in which each human being has an interest; so the laws of etiquette, well enforced, oblige us to make concessions to the many tastes, prejudices and habits of those we meet in the social circle, at public entertainments, in business relations or when traveling."

(Page 24)

And so, as I read this interesting, mind reeling, and cross-cultural book, my own thoughts of basic, yet proper, etiquette squirm to be freed from my mind and onto paper.

Here is the beginnings of, perhaps, many parts of proper etiquette in our technological society.

Cellular Phones are beyond common in our society. So much so, in fact, that it is considered unusual when a family does not own as many cell phones as family members.

Since cell phones hit the market, so quickly and even more quickly became the biggest rage, and most popular fad, no on, no adult, no teacher, no student nor child, has apparently come up with some basic principles that one should follow, while using their cellular device, in order to not appear to be a rude or disrespectful person.

I have not seen, or heard of any such book, or any such person who has come up with such basic principles to follow while using a cell phone. I'm continually shocked and continuously hear of parents who are shocked at their children's rude and disrespectful attitude because there are no "laws laid" for them to follow, concerning their technical device.

So, I write this with the great concern for my generation, that you would at least read and come up with some fundamental laws of your own, to follow, which put others before yourself, and human - meaning face-to-face- interaction at a higher priority than a mechanical one.

General Cell-Phone Usage

Cell phones are used as regular, land-line phones, but are generally used more often, and it's becoming more popular to replace a land-line with cell phones. There are also many more gadgets and nifty add-ons to a regular conversing device, on a cell phone.

So I've organized this section into smaller areas of possible interest, based on the use of a cell phone (texting, talking, etc.)

There is an introduction to each section which defines the terms used for those who may not be well acquainted with the cell-phone world.

Texting

Texting, more or less, is instant message over cell phone. However, there is not yet any rule as to when it is appropriate to text back - this is left up to the cell phone holders good, or bad, judgement. I have found the cell-phone user to have quite bad judgement when it comes to texting, which not only causes frustration when attempting at a conversation, but I have also felt rather blown off by those who choose to text while conversing.

Appropriate timing for Texting

"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the Heavens." Unfortunately, cell phone usage and texting is not included in the list of "timeliness" in the third chapter of Ecclesiastes. So we'll just have to form our own ideas on timely use, based on the attitude of putting others before yourself.

It's definitely appropriate to text when your alone- in solitude, no one else is around you, there is no chance at all that you might happen to bump into someone you know, which could possibly start up a conversation. Another general, basic, basic, basic, rule is to text only when you don't have some other responsibility which may be demanding your time. This rule also makes it easier to avoid putting things off.

Responsibilities more important than texting could be:

• During a speech - it's important to actively listen
• During a sermon - when one texts during a sermon this not only shows disrespect but disinterest and an extraordinary amount of rudeness to the pastor, those around, and most importantly, disrespect to The House of God
• Chores your parents give
• Work that must be completed - home work, business work, church work, etc.
• During work - if you're a barista, please don't text on the job. This is very rude, and alienates business. Baby-sitters and child care workers, you're hired to care for and watch the child, not let 'em loose and if they get hurt put a band-aid on it. Do the job you were hired to do!
• While Driving - Please, do yourself and all those around you a favor and do NOT text while driving. Not only is this unsafe because your eyes are not on the road, but also because your mind is not focused on driving, but on text messaging, making your driving unpredictable and confusing other drivers. This is especially important when others are in the car with you. Please do not text while driving!
• At school. Scientia Potentia - knowledge is power. If you must text someone, and it is vitally important, like if it's to a teach, parent, adult or work, wait until after your class is over, and you are in a somewhat solitary place. God gave you a mind to steward. You are not stewarding that which God has placed in your hands and blessed you with if you are texting during a class.
• It's always, always, rude to text when talking with, greeting, saying goodbye, listening or have any sort of conversation with any other human being. This conveys an extraordinary lack of curiosity for another creation of God, rudeness, indifference and an incredible lack of caring or concern for a brother or sister in Christ. If you are interacting with a non-Christian while you are texting, what are you conveying to that person about your relationship with Christ? Are you being a good witness? Are you treating them they way God longs for you to treat them? What would Christ think if he walked up in that moment?

If you must text while driving, or during a class, or during work, please wait until after you have completed what must be done at school (like, after class), or at work, this means you need to communicate well with your boss or the other person on duty, or pull over off the road into a safe parking place, and text away. But wait until its safe, and you have stewarded well what God's given you (your mind, your job, your relationships, etc., etc.)

If you're a host, or a guest: RESTRAIN FROM TEXTING! If this means turning off the phone and hiding it or locking it away: DO SO! I have been to people's homes, as a guest, where the hosts teenagers were texting. I use the term "teenager" as a descriptive term, meaning they were self-absorbed, unsocialized when it came appropriate adult interaction (such as that with my parents), and rather immature. Those who text while hosting a guest are immediately placed in the "teenager" category in my mind - adult children, teenage-men/women, etc. Even if you see the guests are your parents guests, you still owe your parents the respect and honor they deserve by being, at the very least, polite to their guests, and greeting them at the door, waving them goodbye, and helping your mom clear the table, serving the food, passing the food around the table, etc. YOU OWE YOUR PARENTS! They worked to pay for your education, which more than half the world cannot afford, they fed you every day, watered you, gave you a bed, and at the very least put a roof over your head. You owe your parents.

"Children honor your father and mother..."

- Exodus 20:12; Deuteronomy 5:16; Matthew 15:4;

Matthew 19:19; Mark 7:10; Mark 10:19;

Luke 18:20; Ephesians 6:2.

Based on these eight scriptures throughout the Bible, I would say this is pretty important.

When to "Pull the Plug"

There have been numerous times when I have been sitting in a church service and some one's cell phone goes off, or there is a group of teenagers, even adults, texting during a service.

If you are in a church, then there is no reason why you should have your cell phone ringing, or be texting, unless some emergency has happened in your family and you are needed ASAP. Sorry, this sounds harsh, but give me a good reason why you should be texting when you are in a church to learn about and grow deeper in the Word of God, and learn to be better in your part as The Body of Christ.

In fact, it would bring the pastor great delight, and show an amazing amount of respect that few people are capable of showing if you simply turned of your cellular device.

If you absolutely must use your cell phone during a church service, if there is a family emergency or you are on call at work, please find a secluded place to take or make your call. Such as the church office, if you're granted permission, outside, or some other place where there are few people and you will not be disrupting anyone.

Sexting

If you're a committed Christian, than you know the rule to this: Don't do it. Period. The end. End of discussion. Go read your Bible!